it's a mixed up time of year

I was at invited to a swingers party once where a man in a rubber mask told me a rather silly story.

There was once a lonely Tgirl who fell madly in love with the local magician. The magician got pretty annoyed with a Tgirl following him around as people started to gossip and giggle when he walked past. So he called theTgirl in to see him and said, 'See here. I can't afford to have a guy in a frock following me around. To be blunt, it's bad for business'.
The Tgirl, who was totally smitten replied, 'Is it these heels? Do they make me look slutty?'
'No, it's not your heels...'
'It's my handbag, isn't it? I know it didn't match the rest of my outfit properly', interrupted the Tgirl.
'Look!', said the exasperated magician. 'Here's what we'll do. I'm gonna give you a magic potion. It'll turn you into a female.'

Delighted at the prospect of winning the man of her dreams the Tgirl eagerly gulped down the potion, even though the liquid fizzled and gave off an eerie green mist. It tasted awful, like toothpaste and coffee mixed together.

No sooner had the Tgirl drained the cup than she changed into a female - a female goldfish. She was left helplesly flopping and flapping her fins in her now discarded clothing, gasping for air. The magician deftly filled a plastic bag with water, popped her in and headed off to the local funfair. That poor unfortunate Tgirl - she was offered as a prize on the tombola stall and won by a gross ugly boy who, as soon as he got her home, fed half of her to his pet bear and the other half to his rat. Eeeeeek!